MY ENEMY IS MY FRIEND/FAMILY: CHOOSE YOUR CIRCLES WISELY

Hello guys.

Everyone has friends and families, right? Or, maybe everyone just thinks they do. Do you have an experience related to this topic? When your friend or family becomes your worst enemy or we can call it ‘frenemy/famnemy’. I define a frenemy/famnemy as a someone who respects and hates you at the same time. We all have them. That one friend or family we plaster on a smile for because we can’t stand him/her. It’s the one where we use air quotes when describing him/her as a “friend” or “family”. A frenemy/famnemy is someone you’re friendly with despite disliking him/her. Your dislike could be derived from rivalry or jealousy, or maybe he’s/she’s simply not your cup of tea. He/She could be an enemy you’re friendly with, or an untrustworthy person that you need to keep close tabs on because you can’t really trust him/her. Or he’s/she’s not really your friend/family that you might just pretend to be for one reason or another.

I started looking up the meaning of “relationship” mainly because we live in an era where nobody seems to remember the meaning of it anymore. I think the word relationship gets thrown around inappropriately these days. I look around and think about my own personal experiences and others that I have observed, and most everyone has had an experience where they thought their particular relationship was genuine, only to discover that betrayal or insincerity was present. It is all too common that people’s selfishness gets in the way of their ability to be a good friend or family member. Few things are more heartbreaking than discovering that the people closest to you never really cared for you or loved you. They only be with you because on your wealth or benefits that they can get from you and when you having a bad situation, they gone.

The best way to decide whether this relationship might not be healthy is to be honest with yourself about how you feel when you’re with them. Do you generally feel worse when you hang out with them? Do you feel drained of energy any time you spend time with them? Toxic relationship is bad for our mental health and wellbeing. If you can’t improve the relationship, you should think about letting it go.

So choose your circles wisely. Surround yourself with those who genuinely love others and who care more about morality than what people think about them. In the same way, be good to them. Be willing to put the needs of others ahead of yourself; that’s the true meaning of the word “friend” and “family”.